Webster’s Dictionary defines communication as a process by which information is exchanged between individuals through a common system of symbols, signs, or behavior. Sounds simple, right? We all know that is not true, we have enough problems communicating with each other face to face in this world, but now add the complexity of email, and we have opened a bag of worms.
As a reporter at atelevision station, I work in the business of communication, and yet I cannot count how many times we have had misunderstandings or disagreements over something that was not communicated properly in an email. My guess is you have experienced similar situations in your business as well.
The Christian Science Monitor captured this thought well when it noted “Because it lacks cues like tone of voice and facial expression, email makes it more difficult to accurately decode the writer’s meaning, making relationships more fragile in a conflict situation. For stronger business and personal relationships, it’s important to build the kind of rapport that comes best from direct, personal communication.”
This shows that though e–mail is a quick and convenient medium that can work well in some situations, researchers have identified three major problems:
- Email lacks the ability to convey human emotion. That makes it difficult for recipients to decode meaning well. God created us with five wonderful senses, but email only allows us to use one: vision. However, when you communicate in person, you can read a person’s expression, hear the tone of their voice, and see the soul in their eyes. How important is that when interpreting a message? It’s crucial. For example, remember when you first read a famous book, such as Lord of the Rings or any of the Chronicles of Narnia? Your mind had a picture of what those worlds looked like that was likely a different from everyone else’s. Similarly, it’s possible to interpret an email differently than the sender intended it. All the more reason to hear their idea in person.
- Second, the prospect of instantaneous communication creates an urgency that pressures e–mailers to think and write quickly, which can lead to carelessness. Remember that time you were running late, you read an email and quickly replied, but perhaps in your rush, you did not bother to spell–check, but just hit send and left the office. The next day, you realized in horror your email contained numerous misspelled words, and the recipient was not clear what you meant. We have more time to collect our thoughts when writing a letter, speaking on the phone or speaking in person. And, if we make a mistake, we can show emotion or behaviors which can explain the words we chose. We do not have this ability in email.
- Third, email does not provide satisfying personal relationships. It is difficult to establish rapport over an email. How many times have you misunderstood an email, gotten mad at the other person, met in person and realized you had misjudged them completely? In a world where email, fax and text–messaging technology was introduced to make communication easier, such technology tends to complicate it even more. Ask yourself this question – are you really saving yourself time by conducting business through email? While it seems like a quick fix in the moment, consider this: In research reported in 2000, Harvard Business School professor, Kathleen Valley, found that about 50% of negotiations conducted by email end in impasse, while only about 19% of face–to–face negotiations do so. She also concluded that we behave different by our emails than we do in person. In emails, we tend to share less information about a topic than when we talk in person or by telephone. So, we end up discussing an issue based on more limited knowledge and understanding. The end result is possible conflict that could have been resolved or avoided, face to face.
God created us to be social creatures. He did not desire us to be slaves to our computers. There is nothing like enjoying the company of and social interaction with other people. You can read their expressions, hear their tones of voice, and see the soul in their eyes. Never underestimate this. Next time you have an important issue to discuss or thought to share with another person, turn off your computer and pick up the phone. Better yet, head to the nearest Starbucks, grab two comfy chairs, and sit down for a good chat!
