Sam was in kindergarten when we knew something was “different.” Other children began to shun him, and he seemed perfectly content remaining in his structured and organized world.

Struggling with outbursts, it wasn’t until the end of the second grade when someone who had attended a mandatory district workshop for educators strongly suggested a reason for Sam’s challenges: Sam had autism.

Like a crashing wave, it hit me as I read the symptoms: clumsy motor skills, intense interest in one topic, separation from peers, etc. Sam had a form of high-functioning autism called Asperger’s syndrome.

After a period of grief over all the things we thought our child would never take part in, my husband and I quickly began to seek knowledge on his diagnosis, as well as find the solutions.

Now Sam is a junior at Reagan High School with a near 100 average in engineering and the ability to speak and write in Japanese. Although he never gets invited to parties or outings, Sam is doing fine.

The journey with producing the documentary and booklet, “Coping to Excelling,” began just over a year ago as a quest to assist younger mothers who are embarking on the journey of raising a child on the higher end of the autism spectrum.

Careful to gather the most knowledgeable in their field of autism and Asperger study, the interviews took many months to gather and many more to transcribe and assimilate. Excited by the diverse, yet solid knowledge that made its way into a fluid form, I felt the step-by-step information would provide solid tools to assist parents though the school years or at least provide them with a great place to start.

What I never expected to occur on this journey was the impact of Dr. Temple Grandin. I mention this to share the enlightenment she offered me and my boys through her genuine interest in – if not concern about – getting them on the right path by way of her experience living with autism.

The powerful and insightful contributions Grandin has made to the “Coping to Excelling” program bear me passing on to you, the reader. I’ll try to summarize so you, too, can benefit from her experience and wisdom. Here we go:

An absolute for getting your child past the bullying, especially during the dreaded middle school years, is shared interests. Let geeks be with geeks! Whether it’s art, math, auto shop or rocket building, your Asperger child will certainly feel better around those with similar interests.

Get them hands-on work experience, and do not revel in the label of autism, but rather, in their particular area of interest.

Another strong statement within the documentary came from Janessa Manning, who is currently working on her doctorate at UT Health Science Center right here in San Antonio. Her specialty of study is magnetic resonance imaging on autistic minds.

“The brain of your child who has been newly diagnosed with high-functioning autism, or Asperger’s, is different and functions in different ways than a typically developing child,” she said. “This is not a choice the child is making; we see actual neurological differences when we query by both anatomy and function.

“So there is a great importance to getting therapy and getting treatments, well-defined efficacious treatments, and trying to improve the behaviors, but [also to] understanding that they are coming from a place of being different neurologically.”

Wow! That is a strong statement that bears repeating. The high-functioning autistic, or Asperger, brain is different in its function and in its anatomy. This is not a choice the child makes. In other words, it’s not bad parenting or bad behavior; these children are wired differently.

Manning goes on to say that imaging should eventually help diagnose autism based upon brain biomarkers instead of by behavioral observation, as is currently the practice in diagnosing Asperger’s syndrome.

A bit of a surprise, when gathering interviews for the documentary, I searched for a soundtrack or music that felt touching, yet smart. My husband, Herb Allen, wrote a hauntingly beautiful piece of music titled, “Sam’s Song.” He mixed chords that typically don’t go together, evoking feelings of these incredible and gifted individuals who often get overlooked in a crowd.

Rudy Gatlin and Randy Wills graciously took “Sam’s Song” and wrote and produced a masterpiece of a soundtrack for the “Coping to Excelling” documentary.

It’s very easy to get caught up in a form of pity because you are reminded of your child’s autism daily by way of disgusted looks, elusive soccer-mom neighbors or family turmoil.

However, by staying focused on your child and your family as a whole, you’ll find another world of astronomy, physics, inventions or Pokémon to appreciate. It’s different, but it can be both fascinating and liberating at the same time.

Let’s celebrate our children’s eccentricities and not worry so much about what others think. Removing the obstacles and allowing them to be who they were intended is all we can do as parents.

Bottom line: Let’s take them from merely “Coping to Excelling”!

To reach Jennifer Allen and see and read exerts from the “Coping to Excelling” documentary and booklet, please go to www.copingtoexcelling.com.