Much like a reprisal ofthe role played by WilliamHurt in the 1991 movie, TheDoctor, I was blessed withseeing the medical worldfrom the other side of thebackless hospital gown. Inthe movie, Mr. Hurt portraysa wealthy, arrogantdoctor who is diagnosedwith throat cancer. During his diagnostic and treatment intervention,he is made to suffer the humiliation, condescensionand helplessness that all seriously ill patients must endure. Aftermany incidents highlighting the medical profession’s propensitytoward callousness and neglect, Hurt takes a group ofmedical trainees, places them into hospital gowns and forcesthem to experience a patient’s perspective. As anticipated, thestudent doctors walk away from the experience with a changedattitude.
My near–death experience, which included two major operations,changed not only my attitude, but my life forever. Inaddition to the usual and expected cliché–oriented paradigmshifts such as ‘taking one day at a time,’ ‘stopping to smell theroses’ and ‘making every day count,’ I discovered how to be abetter doctor. Out of my fear, helplessness and dependencerose insight that permeates my relationship with my patientstoday. While still recovering from my wounds, I discovereda world of empathy, hope and renewal. Even today my scarsremind me of my vulnerability and mortality. My soul willtranscend this imperfect life to a better place one day…and forthat, I am eternally grateful. Knowing that there is an afterlifefilled with perfect, peaceful days, inspires me to share in mypatients’ sorrows and helplessness. I can embrace their painand comfort them at life’s end.
“The superficiality of this world now vaporizes into unsanctifiedmist and is replaced by concrete, comfortable thoughtsof what really matters: God, family and a few good friends.”
Reflecting on my pre–illness photos, I now see an agingand flawed body. Yet out of my brush with the terminality ofmy existence came wisdom. The superficiality of this worldnow vaporizes into unsanctified mist and is replaced by concrete,comfortable thoughts of what really matters: God, familyand a few good friends. Through my sojourn of sickness, Ihave learned forgiveness, patience, kindness and most of all…the ability to love and be loved.
“Through my sojourn of sickness, I have learned forgiveness,patience, kindness and most of all…the ability to love andbe loved.”
Out of my greatest pain came divine self–revelation. I havean appreciation of God’s perfect world which is tainted onlyby his children’s free will. My physician colleagues, as you readthis column, understand that, barring catastrophe, you toowill be a patient one day. When you are sick and near death,you will have only one place to look…up. My prayer for you isthat you will be looking up at a kind and loving physician whohas the Great Physician’s hand on his/her shoulder. And forthe grace of God, should you recover, the world you see willnever be the same again.
“Out of my greatest pain, came divine self–revelation”.
Physicians and surgeons, let this day be the day that youreaffirm your oath to care for others in a way in which youwould want to be the recipient of care. Your occupation is nota job, it is a calling. Pour your soul and gifts into every patientcare experience! You, as well as your patients will be thebenefactors of the blessing you have been granted…to be acompassionate healer.
Until next time, live well!
